Former ‘Bachelor' Colton Underwood comes out as gay, says he's 'happiest and healthiest' he's ever been

The first 'virgin Bachelor' revealed the news on Good Morning America today.
April 14, 2021 10:03 a.m. EST
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Colton Underwood became The Bachelor to find his soulmate, but since then, he has traded his soulmate-search for soul-searching. Speaking with Good Morning America host Robin Roberts this morning, Colton, who was dubbed as the “virgin Bachelor” from his time on the franchise, revealed that after struggling with happiness, and his mental health, he can finally come out and tell the world that he is gay.

“I've ran from myself for a long time. I've hated myself for a long time, and I'm gay,” the 29-year-old former NFL’er told Roberts. “I came to terms with that earlier this year and have been processing it. And the next step in all of this was sort of letting people know. I'm still nervous."

“I'm emotional, but in such a good happy positive way. I'm the happiest and healthiest I've ever been in my life."

Colton first entered Bachelor Nation as a contestant on Becca Kufrin’s season of The Bachelorette in 2018 (where he made it to the final 4) and then, after a stint on Bachelor in Paradise, was cast in the 2019 season of The Bachelor.

He ultimately ended up dating Cassie Randolph (the woman whom he jumped a fence for, you might recall) from the show until March 2020 when they announced their split.

Speaking about the inner turmoil he has endured to keep his secret, Colton told Roberts, “I would have rather died than said, 'I'm gay,' and I think that was my wake-up call."

"There was a moment in L.A. that I woke up and I didn't think I was going to wake up. I didn't have the intentions of waking up. And I did. And for me, I think that was my wake-up call of, 'This is your life. Take back control.'"

"I don't feel that anymore," he said of his mental health struggle and suicide ideation.

He went into more detail about his journey as a gay man, and how from a young age he knew he was different, and was tormented for it by his church and his classmates.

“I've known that I've been different since the age of 6, and I couldn't process it and I couldn't put my finger on what it was until high school of my freshman year when I knew I was gay."

In his book, The First Time: Finding Myself and Looking for Love on Reality TV, released in March 2020, Colton wrote that rumours he was gay spread around his high school making their way to his parents. His father even found gay porn sites in his searchbar results, including questions such as, “Am I gay?,” “How do you know if you’re gay?” and “Why don’t I like having sex with my girlfriend?”

Colton explained that incident away as pure curiosity in his memoir. “He asked if I wanted to talk about it. I said no, explaining that I’d figured things out on my own. I begged him not to tell Mom. I’m sure he did,” he wrote. “But neither of them ever spoke about it with me. All that research, though, led me to understand that I was definitely attracted to girls.”

Noting to Roberts that, "I learned in the Bible that gay is a sin," he recalled how, in the NFL, the word "gay" was used to describe a bad play or move. "There are a lot of things where I look back and say, 'No wonder I held it in.'"

“I used to wake up in the morning and pray for him to take the gay away,” he says of God. “I used to pray for him to change me and I can now wake up and pray to God and I can actually have faith and I can go into church and be present; not have it be conditional on this topic of, 'Take this off my plate and I'll still worship you and I'll still be there.' It's more, I'm closer to him. And that's helped.”

Before speaking with Roberts on GMA, he came out to his friends and family, and credits their support with his ability to speak about it publicly. "The only reason I'm sitting down with you today is because I have the love and support of my friends and my family."

In a statement to The Hollywood Reporter, executive producers of The Bachelor franchise said of Colton’s coming out: “We are so inspired by Colton Underwood’s courage to embrace and pursue his authentic self. As firm believers in the power of love, we celebrate Colton's journey in the LGBTQIA+ community every step of the way."

Colton’s time on The Bachelor was fraught with chaos and drama, something he admits he regrets.

"Do I regret being The Bachelor and do I regret handling it the way I did? I do. I do think I could have handled it better," he said. "I just wish I wouldn't have dragged people into my own mess of figuring out who I was. I genuinely mean that."

Case in point, Bachelor Nation might remember comedian Billy Eichner’s awkward and funny cameo during Colton’s season, where the funny man, who is openly gay, questioned Colton’s sexuality to his face. Colton giggled nervously during that moment but said nothing.

Reacting to the news this morning, Bachelor Nation seems divided. While most of them support his decision to live his truth and honour who he is, they cannot forget that, after splitting with Cassie Randolph, Colton engaged in some predatory behaviour. Cassie even filed a restraining order against him over alleged harassment. According to the police report, she claimed Colton put a tracking device on her car. She dropped the charges in the fall of 2020.

Speaking directly to Cassie, and to fans he may have disappointed, Colton told Roberts, “I messed up. I made a lot of bad choices. I loved everything about her. And that only made it harder and more confusing for me."

He added, "I'm sorry for the pain and emotional stress I caused. I wish it wouldn't have happened the way it did. I wish that I would have been courageous enough to fix myself before I broke anybody else."

Now that he is openly gay, Colton has admitted that he still hasn’t found an emotional connection with a man yet, but he is open to finding that person. Perhaps, as one fan suggested, The Bachelor franchise could help in that endeavour…

That is a season we would LOVE to see.

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