SNL's Cecily Strong shares the devastating story of grieving a loved one during quarantine

The ongoing global pandemic has not only tested people on a physical level as thousands around the world have suffered through the deadly virus, but the mental and emotional strain of coronavirus has been even more wide-reaching. As many have lost loved ones to COVID-19 without being able to spend their last moments together or mourn them with family and friends, SNL’s Cecily Strong is finding herself alone in her grief as she mourns her young cousin who passed away only weeks before North America began physical distancing measures.The Saturday Night Live comedian penned a raw and emotional article for New York Magazine, speaking candidly about enduring the loss of her cousin Owen to brain cancer. Strong said that in January, she received a call that the tumor doctors had hoped would shrink had not, giving Owen only hours left to live. First diagnosed in March 2018 at the age of 28, Strong said that Owen went to the ER after suffering from migraines and was given an MRI, where doctors saw his tumor and diagnosed him with brain cancer. “We cried together on the phone,” said Strong, recalling the phone conversation with her father when she learned about Owen’s diagnosis. “Brain cancer is a death sentence, right?”Following his surgery to remove the tumor, Strong visited her cousin and his parents and found that the 28-year-old had kept his sense of humor, looking resilient in the face of adversity. “Owen has this quality of being the one who supports everyone around him, even while being the one who is undergoing vigorous treatments for glioblastoma,” said Strong.Owen eventually began treatment using polio therapy and worked with a highly regarded doctor who believed he would be able to cure the cancer. “I have no idea what that means and what it means for his body,” said Strong about Owen’s therapy. “In fact, I will never know what Owen experiences because he will never let on to the extent of his struggles. I’m not the only one. Doctors looking at his final MRI say later that because of the size and position of his tumor, they didn’t know how he was standing and laughing and talking as long as he was.”[video_embed id='1943371']RELATED: How to support people who are grieving during the pandemic[/video_embed]Owen eventually passed away in January while Strong was filming the 44th season of SNL, where she has been a cast member since 2012. The non-stop pace of writing and filming helped Strong keep moving in the wake of Owen’s death, but the comedian, who says she has suffered from anxiety and depression for years, was forced to stop and confront her grief when quarantine began. “Owen just d—. I can’t say it or write it. I’m so low and I’m so afraid. I’m afraid of the water coming out of my pipes. I’m afraid of outside. And I am so alone. I’ve never felt so alone,” writes Strong.

 

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Sharing my cousin @takemetoyourleda ‘s beautiful words about our dude on International Owen Day. I love you, Leda. I love you, Owen. ???

A post shared by Cecily Strong (@cecilystrong) on Apr 6, 2020 at 8:56am PDT

In February, Strong shared pictures from her birthday celebration and thanked her family and friends for helping her endure the pain of Owen’s passing. “I had a very difficult past month or so. (Difficult is a light word but I want to stay light here). I didn’t know how it would feel to “celebrate” this birthday in New York because someone I love so so so much wouldn’t be there,” writes Strong on Instagram. “Thank you to my friends and my family and anyone and everyone who has made me feel so loved and supported and made me smile- all the time but especially these last couple of weeks. It’s felt almost surreal in the best of ways. It feels big. And thank you O, for letting me carry around so much love because the sadness on its own is too heavy.”Strong ended the beautiful essay by remembering her beloved cousin, writing “Here’s a thing I know for sure: I had a cousin named Owen who had red hair as a little boy and he was a serious kid and he loved birds. He taught me about love during his life and he’s teaching me about love after. And I’m really lucky.”Since the article was published on Tuesday, Strong said she’s been humbled by the response of people who are sharing in her effort to find a way through the grief. “Can’t stop crying today because of all the kind words or personal experiences people have shared with me,” writes Strong. “It means a lot.”

 

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Thanks Vulture and New York Magazine (and some fabulous agents) for helping me share my hero. Love you Owen. Love you Leda. Love you, too, Myka Che. *also can’t stop crying today because of all the kind words or personal experiences people have shared with me. It means a lot*

A post shared by Cecily Strong (@cecilystrong) on Apr 21, 2020 at 12:23pm PDT

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