Rebecca King-Crews reveals the secrets to her long, healthy marriage to Terry Crews

It’s about this time in February, people around the world collectively wonder just what the secret is to a long and lasting relationship. While there aren't any hard-and-fast answers, a couple that has the longevity to back up their tidbits of advice is the Crewses. Rebecca King-Crews and her husband Brooklyn Nine-Nine star Terry Crews have been happily married since 1990. The couple celebrated their milestone 30th anniversary with a party in July 2019, which included a performance from Stevie Wonder and a replica of their original wedding cake. 

While speaking with etalk’s Sonia Beeksma, Rebecca let us in on her secret to a long, healthy marriage. “There are three things that I adhere to when it comes to marriage. I call them the three Cs. Commitment being that you don’t just run. Communication being, say what you feel. Don’t be so polite that your spouse doesn’t know how you feel. And compassion, really the word is empathy, putting yourself in the other person’s shoes,” she said.

Rebecca said that over the course of their relationship, they've broken up and remarried “about three times.” The key to staying together each time was when "one of us wanted out, the other one fought for the marriage."

With more than three decades of commitment, Rebecca shared her best advice about what to look for in long-term relationships. “Marry the guy who you know you can count on. You know, the pretty boy is pretty. Don’t shoot for that stuff that’s just about the vanity. Look at the character of the person,” she suggested.

Rebecca said that when she met Terry, he was the kind person she had prayed for. “He was kind, he was ambitious, he was driven. He loved children. He loved people,” she added. 

The White Chicks actor and his wife have five children together — Azriel, Isaiah, Naomi, Tera and Wynfrey — and they’ve stuck by each other through thick and thin.

It hasn’t always been easy for the couple, who have shared their ups and downs. “We’ve survived a lot together. We’ve lost homes together. We’ve lost children, jobs, opportunities. We’ve been rich, we’ve been poor. We’ve been rich, poor. Poor after being rich, you know?” she laughed. “We’ve gone through a lot.”

Rebecca assured fans that although Terry has a very enthusiastic personality, he doesn’t walk around their house popping his pecs or wearing his red underwear from Old Spice. “He is just like everybody else’s dad in his sweatpants and his socks and sandals.” 

She also let us in on another secret: “Believe it or not, mommy can also move her pecs. I’ve done it a couple of times on TV, but they edit me out for daytime because it’s a little too frisky. As long as I’ve known Terry he’s been popping his pecs.”

Couples that pop their pecs together, stay together. 

BEFORE YOU GO: Romantic cocktails to set the mood this Valentine’s Day